I officially hate this hotel.
When we moved in I was all, �Oh, how cute is this? All this miss-matched craftsmen work? This weird bed? And they still have the Christmas wreaths on the doors. I love it here!� which has quickly turned into �Ohmyhellhowlongdowehavetobehereagain???�
Besides the colorful guests we have the pleasure of getting to know much more intimately than one ever should, we have crickets which I’m going to start charging for their stay in our room. Crickets are not the same thing as cockroaches so I�m not living in fear, only slight bemusement and disgust. They are some wild species of cricket. They have stripes on their legs and way longer antennas than any other kind I�ve seen. And they can only hop slightly and to the side. I think the family lives under the dresser. When it rained so hard the other night the mom, dad and two kids came out for a walk to see the wonderful downpour. I invited them right out the door with a swish of my shoe to get a closer look at the precipitation. They all stayed out there except one which came back in and then had to die. It�s the rule.
Additionally, the maid took a pair of my new-cheap-dripping-with-Wal-Mart-stench-black socks I had to go through so much to get. Joe laughs when I tell him but it’s true � the maid has stolen them. I�m sure she doesn’t think anyone will notice if you take a pair of socks. Socks disappear all the time and you just don’t know where they went. So it’s no big deal, right? People don�t know where their socks go to. Except me. I�m anal enough to know how many pairs of black socks I own especially if they are new ones that I had to buy from Wal-Mart. The maid also sets the shampoo bottle on the floor instead of back in the shower. Why does she do that? And how come when I get back to the room at night the bathroom light is always on? It�s all designed to slowly entice me into madness.