The fridge is slowly dying. First, I noticed that stuff on the door wasn’t cold, the mustard and ketchup were far too fluid. Then came the smell and I noticed that the milk was almost warm. I suppose as someone that likes her milk with tiny ice clusters here and there, normally chilled milk would seem not cold enough, but believe me when I say the cold cereal was colder than the milk. Then, the light stopped working. Now, I realize that the light is probably not connected to whatever mechanism keeps the refrigerator cold, but it is a bit suspicious, no? And now, the things on the freezer door such as the OJ and the 8 Wendy’s cups of leftover Frosty* are barely not frozen. You can squeeze the sides and the stuff inside squishes without a second thought. I’m looking at the meat and the fish and thinking they are destined for the trash, as getting sick to my stomach happens easily enough to me with well-cooked food, let alone slightly bad meat.
This is all in conjunction with the drains upstairs suddenly not working well, the sprinkler system shooting off the tops of some of the sprinkler heads and flooding the neighbor’s yard and the carpet downstairs looking like ass due to our awesome ability to run the rented professional carpet cleaner. The lighter-colored stripe from the front door, through the living room and out to the back door by the kitchen looks like the pelt of a very large skunk. When the commercial tells you that you can just clean the ‘well-trafficked’ area of your home? Be smarter than we were. Clean the entire thing or 2 days later you’ll be very, very sorry.
*I only want 2 bites. Only 2. And then the rest of the Frosty goes in the freezer. I keep thinking one of the kids will eat the rest. But they don’t. I might need to rethink my strategy.