I got an email from China (a woman, not the place) who asked me to write about what a bad day felt like to me. She didn’t think that my bad days could be anywhere near as bad as hers because she feels so bad that she “just can’t think or feel or she might die.” I wrote back that it wasn’t a contest of any kind but if she wanted, in a few weeks, I would write about what a bad day felt like to me.

I have a bad day one or two times a month. This is what they feel like to me. I also have lots and lots of Good Days and I’ll be writing about that next week sometime. Everything I tell someone that writes me an email regarding how I get through a bad day is exactly how I do it. I’m not just making stuff up. I actually do the things that I say work, because they work for me. Of course, that doesn’t mean they will work for you. Everyone is different.

I could have not shared this with all of you. But wouldn’t that be hypocritical? To be the one always giving advice on how to work through big issues and get to a good place emotionally? To pretend that I’m always fine and never feeling depressed? Because I do. Sometimes, and this is for everyone on the planet, you have a bad day and you feel like shit. Now, maybe you don’t get as dark as I do. And I don’t even get as dark as I used to. But you probably know what I’m talking about.

Thanks for all the well-wishes and encouragement. I am so thankful to have so many readers that care about me. I sure wish that I had prefaced the entry with a little “Hey There, Y’all” so you would have known and I promise to do that in the future.

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8 Comments

  1. You knucklehead* you! You scared the crap out of us. I’m thinking, damn, I just talked to her yesterday & she sounded fine, things must be really out of whack.

    Anyway, I stand by everything I said. You ARE important — and smart, and funny, and beautiful, and competent. And if you feel that down in the dumps, counseling is in order. China, whomever and wherever you are, that goes for you too. You don’t have to live your life feeling that sad.

    *”knucklehead” said affectionately, of course. But if you lived closer I’d give you noogies right now! 😉

  2. Thank you for sharing so much of yourself. The one thing that took me a long time to accept is that no one is happy or has good days all the time. Once I started to accept that and to stop fighting every bad mood, anxious feeling and bouts of depression I found that many times they passed quicker. By allowing myself to feel rather than fight everthing I am feeling the emotions seem to ride our their wave with less bite.

    That said I also like a motto I once heard, “fake it till you make it.”

  3. Bravo! Thanks for letting us know that you are in fact, human and you have shitty days 🙂 You speak the language of the heart so very well and so honestly–that is what shines through in your posts.

    The folks that get “cured” are the ones I am most suspicious of 🙂 Life is life and we are perpetual “life students” in which we never graduate. Personally, I think it is ok to feel bad and to have bad days.

    As a side note, about 6 people in my close circle all went haywire today between noon and 1pm (including myself). Later, I met a very dear and old friend of 14 years for dinner (who happens to be a psychic) and she mentioned that the moon went into pisces at 12:05 today and that you will see a lot of emotional people. I was like, “Damn! that’s what happened!”

  4. Oh Leah, I was thinking all day, “What the hell can I say here? Am unhelpful and also: useless.”

    Ah, you are brilliant. Brilliant at describing what you felt, but aren’t feeling at the time. Astonishing.

  5. “Flawed but authentic”

    The authentic part is what makes your posts so wonderful, whether your talking about your good days, bad days or any days in between.

    Thank you for your brave honesty. And beautiful writing.

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