It’s 10pm on the 11th. I’m just about ready to hit the hay.

I’m 36.

I’m super emotional, but it’s not because I’m 36.

I’m happy. And I’m sad, but not for any discernable reason.

I woke up to the sounds of Joe downstairs, puttering around. Then he drove me to LA and I took a photo of a photographer for an interview I’m doing (meta?). I found the photographer at the Disney Concert Hall, went in and got out within 5 minutes (thanks to the helpful and courteous security man at the stairs) and when we got out the sky was strange all afternoon: low clouds with the odd bird flying around (photo below). When we got back home, Alexandra took me out to Starbucks and bought me a Grande Soy Chai Latte with her own gift card (I’ll see the boys tomorrow for the weekend (including Monday! Woot!) but she is going to be gone, so we had our day today). Then we went to the house and watched The Family Stone and picked songs for the CD we want to do together (If anyone has a recording studio, let me know).

Even when I pool all my resources and gather all my strength, I’m still mostly a mess. Picking out what to eat for dinner is almost too much and Joe has to lead me down the grocery aisle feeding me yes or no questions (when I say the words rice and soup, are you happy?) and singing me Little Fat Man to help me through.

But here it is, 10:13 pm on January 11th, 2007, and I’m happy. I may be crying because I can’t seem to control my emotions, but really? I’m happy. And things are great. And Joe made me his famous raspberry donuts and told me he loved me. I know whatever issues I’m having with my sadness and tear ducts isn’t really REAL. It’s hormonal. And everything is fine.

It was a perfect day.


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  1. I get the tear ducts problem. I, too, have been weeping here and there like a leaky tap. I’m glad you’re happy, though, and that you have Joe, who obviously knows how to navigate a grocery store.

  2. I first heard that Extras sketch on the Fresh Air interview with Ricky Gervais a few weeks ago. The whole show was so great. Terry Gross was actually laughing so hard she snorted.

  3. Oh, it’s such a perfect day
    I’m glad I spent it with you.
    such a perfect day
    you just keep me hanging on.
    you just keep me hanging on.


    Happy day to you, ms. Leah. I’m sorry there was a little sadness in there but I suppose that makes the happy parts all the more powerful.

    I’m glad your day was a happy one. And it’s a good thing they didn’t show the potentially sad part in The Family Stone, right? It was implied. That was good, right?

    Also, you don’t need a recording studio, just use your ‘puters. Do you have an Apple? Have Garage band? All you need to do is buy a coupld of microphones and maybe a few cords.

    Anyway, happiness to you.

  4. Happy Belated B-day LeahPeah. Just a thought: right around my 36th Birthday I started experiencing what you have described. It lasted for about a week or so, then cleared right up. Then it came again, lasted a little longer & cleared up. Third month, same with shorter time of normalcy. Long Story shortened: during all of this I had my annual appointment and gynecologist advised me that it appeared I was Peri-menopausal. That if I didn’t get my hormones straightened out, I would get “crazier and crazier”.

    Well, all I have to say is Woot woot! for natural progesterone cream! Easy-peasy to resolve. No meds, no therapy and dead worms on the sidewalk after a good rain no longer make me rue the cruelties of life.

  5. Happy Birthday, Leah Peah! How did I find you? How did we meet?

    You’re lovely. Creative. Multi-faceted. Complex.

    And what the hell? Raspberry donuts? I must click on that link.

    HPD, Ree

  6. Leah, what is this feeling we’re all going through? Because it isn’t just you (and other comments note) and me, it’s a lot of people. Welcome to 36. I say that knowing that in three months I’ll be right there with you, but hey… today is about you. Happy Birthday! Enjoy the donuts. The pictures are wonderful and, as usual, I’m in adoration of you.

    Still. kicking. myself. that we didn’t “meet” last July. Ugh.

  7. Maybe it is time for medication. What are you using as your threshold point? Like, “I will go to the doctor when…” What you are going through now isn’t regular and, with your history, I would think that attention from a professional is better had sooner rather than later. If you had a stabbing pain in your side that was usually there but sometimes wasn’t, I don’t think you would wait weeks and weeks before seeking medical attention. At least I hope you wouldn’t, because no one wants to read a post from Joe about how your appendix burst.

  8. happy birthday late!

    also, my good friend’s girlfriend has to quiz her about food like that,

    friend: i’m hungry
    girlfriend: what do you want to eat
    f: ?
    gf: is it corn?
    f: no
    gf: is it chicken?
    f: no
    gf: is it salsa?
    f: I HATE SALSA!!!!
    gf: no you don’t.
    f: i need a drink of water.

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