For further proof that I am the World’s Most Amazing Mom, I instantly disliked my son’s new girlfriend. She’s perfectly fine. Nice. A little nervous. But, nice. And they are both all giggly and lovey-dovey and it’s cute and I’m happy for him. But in the back of my mind I’m thinking, Really? Her? Oh, ok then. And while they sat on the couch with his arm around her shoulders I realized that it wouldn’t matter who she was or how perfect she was because I’m guessing I just wouldn’t like her no matter what. She could come with Barbie’s complete safari outfit, the Jeep, the pool and the salon accessories and I still wouldn’t like her much. Just because he really does. And that is sick. This is his first real girlfriend and consequently my first brush with my lameness in this area.
However, I’m really, really familiar with this same lameness in the moms of boys I’ve known in my life. I’ve been on the receiving end of this many times. And it’s really not fun to be That Girl. That Girl my son is dating. That Girl my son is marrying. That girl. So, in the name of all that is holy and good, I’m manifesting a kinder, gentler America going forward. I will learn to love all the girls my sons bring home. At least the ones they really like. And if I don’t love them right away I’ll keep telling myself I do until it’s true. Because they all deserve it.
I”m laughing because my mother-in-law came to visit this weekend and I sometimes kinda feel like we’re still “settling in” with each other(even after knowing each other 2 years). There are times of awkwardness and then times of acceptance. Its all strange and weird and a part of life I didn’t count on experiencing…Funny to read your post and see the other side of it…
yeah, i’m already thinking about that and my son is only five. i am almost certain that he won’t even begin dating until he’s 30 you know.
i admire your choice on how to handle that, my dad was like that but not my mom. she was the one they had to impress.
I’m just going to sit and cry when my son brings home a girl. That’ll teach the little hussy who’s boss.
Bossy likes her teenage son’s new girlfriend even though the girlfriend is three years younger and hides from Bossy and her husband when given the opportunity. Wait – what did Bossy like about the new girlfriend again?
I thnik just about every parent goes through some defensive/possessive reactions like that. (Wondering what life’ll be life when my daughter gets there…)
At least you’re aware of and working to manage them. Many don’t realize where they’re coming from in that, and end up disservicing their kids that way…