My piece about embracing my gender is up on Shondaland: She grew up wearing girly clothes to fit in with her family. Years later, she cut off her hair and dressed in masculine clothes, embracing her true gender identity. “When I was little, I learned that pretending was a skill I should cultivate. I pretended …

“And I think I’ve been content to let it go, not think about it too hard, and not let myself want too much or care too deeply that the feelings of disgust and vileness about my body persist. I turn the attention away from me and on to them. I make my partners feel beautiful …

“Believing in a gender binary, where only “men” and “women” exist, has created a stifling system where personality traits are attributed to one gender or the other. This ignores the vast intersections where male, female, and non-binary characteristics exist, co-mingle, and crossover. What’s wrong with a man crying and being sensitive? What’s wrong with a …

Read it here.